Friday 4/13/12

Hello. My name is Enrico. I used to be the
intern here at North County Wine Company.
It was a year ago when Jim and Bill, those
despicable miscreants, did the only smart
thing they’ve ever done by hiring me. Then,
true to form for the two biggest morons the
world has ever seen, they fired me. Something
about “insubordination.” They’re idiots.

But that’s not important right now.

What matters is that I’ve spend the last year
plotting my return, and what better day than
Friday the 13th, the unluckiest day those two
slugs could possibly imagine!! Imagine their
surprise when I show up, hijack the whole
operation, dump out the disgusting swill they
plan on pouring, and show the world what
a wine genius I truly am!!!!

Here, for your amusement, are the 7 bottles
of crap they plan on charging you $10 to taste.

Pine Ridge Chenin Blanc/Viognier 2011, $9.97
Handcraft Pinot Noir 2010, $9.97
Colby Red Blend 2010, $9.97
Shoefly Shiraz 2010, $9.97
Contado Mankas Cabernet 2004, $13.97
R Petite Sirah 2009, $22.97
Predator Zinfandel 2010, $13.97

I am disgusted by the mere thought of this
garbage. But that’s not important right now.

What matters is this: my return is imminent,
and so is the demise of Jim and Bill, those two
worthless warthogs who don’t even deserve to
carry my spit bucket!

Come, be part of the revolution! Join me,
Enrico, as I take over North County Wine Company.
(soon to be re-named Enrico Wine Company!)