Tasting Notes 8/26

Tonight we celebrated the sensual side of wine, so I decided
to write the notes in the style of a Harlequin Romance, featuring
 wine hero Sterling Rubicon, of course!

 PROVOCATIVE CHARDONNAY 2009

                Sterling Rubicon is a wine hero for the ages, a man of bold passion and reckless abandon, with a body as chiseled as Michelangelo’s David and a heart as big as his… well, use your imagination.  Riding his white stallion through the English countryside after demolishing an evil plot to serve Port with the wrong cheese, Sterling peers across the moors at a castle.  “What fair maiden might reside therein?” he wonders.  A quick glass of this, with its tropical fruit flavors and hints of vanilla and citrus, and he gallops forward.  89 points Bill.  $14.97.

MADONNA PINOT NOIR 2007

                Sterling rides hard and long, finally stopping at the moat.  He looks up and gasps.  There, from a turret in the tallest tower, Venus Malvasia gazes upon him.  Incandescently beautiful and heart-poundingly voluptuous, she calls to him.  “Save me, kind sir, for I am held prisoner here by the evil Lord Phylloxera.  Plus, I have no wine.”  Sterling fortifies himself with a glass of this lovely Pinot, all berries, cherries and earth.  88 points Bill.  $15.97.

LOYAL COMPANION RED BLEND

                With the castle gate locked, Sterling dives into the moat and finds it filled with poisonous serpents, all swimming furiously toward him.  He kicks powerfully and reaches the other side a second before they can sink their fangs into him.  “The things we do for sex,” he mutters, and pours himself some of this lovely blend.  He revels in its rich, juicy plum and berry fruit, smooth tannins, and long finish.  89 points Bill.  $11.97.

PEJU CABERNET SAUVIGNON 2006

                Venus stares longingly down at Sterling as he finishes his glass and then breaks into the castle.  The rumbling of the castle dragon waking from his slumber barely registers as she imagines this hedonistic wine, with its waves of blackberry, blueberry, currants, sandalwood and chocolate flavors.  93 pts. Wine Enthusiast.  $29.97.

CALCAREOUS TWISTED SISTERS ZINFANDEL 2009

                Sterling sprints up the grand staircase, leaps into the ballroom, and stops… face to face with the dragon!  Steady in the cloud of its sulfurous breath, Sterling whips out a bottle of Calcareous and suggests a deal.  “What do you say?  A bottle of this rich, jammy Zin with boysenberry and raspberry flavors and a long, lingering finish… in exchange for me paying a visit to the hottie upstairs?”  88 points Tobin Brothers.  $15.97.

FLORA SPRINGS TRILOGY 2007

                Sterling leaves the dragon happy and guzzling as he hurries up the tower.  Venus waits with ravenous anticipation, breasts heaving, eyes shining.  His footsteps draw near.  She imagines a passionate encounter with this impeccable blend, as it ravishes her with deep, dark fruit, licorice and menthol notes, and a long, powerful grip.  93 points Robert Parker.  $43.97.

ALCYONE DESSERT WINE

                Sterling bursts through the locked door and sweeps Venus into his arms.  “You’ve been drinking without me,” she protests.  “Not for long, my love.”  He pours her a glass of this pure, liquid hedonism, with its deep, rich flavors of chocolate, toffee, and toasted marshmallow.  She swallows it down.  He gazes deep into her radiant eyes.  “Take me, wine stud.  But pour me another glass first!”  $24.97.